Joke thread.

heylinder · Posted: Wed, 29 Oct 2003 22:23:04 Post Subject:

Doctor Bob had sex with one of his patients and felt
guilty all day
long. No matter how much he tried to forget about it,
he couldn't. The
guilt and sense of betrayal was overwhelming. But
every once in a while
he'd hear an internal, reassuring voice that said:
"Bob, don't worry
about it. You aren't the first doctor to sleep with
one of their
patients and you won't be the last. And you're
single. Just let it
go...". But invariably the other voice would bring
him back to reality,
whispering...

"Bob, you're a vet..."

trekrider · Posted: Wed, 29 Oct 2003 22:42:28 Post Subject:

Did Dr.EC let his goats out again??

trekrider

Everyone seems to be wondering why terrorists are so quick to commit
suicide. Let's see now.
No television,
No cheerleaders,
No baseball,
No football,
No basketball,
No hockey,
No golf,
No tailgate parties,
No pork BBQ,
No hot dogs,
No burgers,
No lobster, shellfish, or even frozen fish sticks,
No chocolate chip cookies,
No Christmas.

They wear rags for clothes, towels for hats.

Constant wailing from the guy next door because he is sick and there are no doctors.

24 hour wailing from a guy in the tower.

You can't shave, your wife can't shave.

You can't shower to wash off the smell of donkey cooked over burning camel dung.

The women have to wear baggy dresses, and veils at all times.

Your bride is picked by someone else, she smells just like your donkey, but
your donkey has a better disposition.

Then they tell you when you die it all gets better.

NOPE!!! NO MYSTERY HERE!!!

trekrider · Posted: Fri, 31 Oct 2003 11:45:39 Post Subject:

For all those men who believe that there's no reason to buy the cow when you can get the milk for free....nowadays 80% of women are against marriage, as they have wised up to the fact that for 6 oz. of sausage, it's not worth buying the entire pig!

HAPPY HOLLOWEEN

BeerCheeze · Posted: Fri, 31 Oct 2003 14:00:50 Post Subject:

heylinder · Posted: Sat, 08 Nov 2003 16:18:37 Post Subject:

An elderly gentleman of 85 feared his
wife was getting hard of hearing. So one day he
called her doctor to make an appointment to have
her hearing checked. The Doctor made an appointment
for a hearing test in two weeks, and meanwhile there's
a simple informal test the husband could do to
give the doctor some idea of the state of her problem.

'Here's what you do," said the doctor,
"start out about 40 feet away from her, and in a
normal conversational speaking tone see if she
hears you. If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so
on until you get a response."

That evening, the wife is in the kitchen
cooking dinner, and he's in the living room. He
says to himself, "I'm about 40 feet away, let's
see what happens."

Then in a normal tone he asks, 'Honey,
what's for supper?" No response.

So the husband moved to the other end of
the room, about 30 feet from his wife and repeats,
"Honey, what's for supper?" Still no response.

Next he moves into the dining room where
he is about 20 feet from his wife and asks,

"Honey, what's for supper?" Again he gets no response so he
walks up to the kitchen door, only 10 feet away.

"Honey, what's for supper?"
Again there is no response, so he walks
right up behind her. "Honey, what's for supper?"

(I just love this!)

"Darn it Earl, for the fourth time,
CHICKEN!"