Doctor Feelgood
Administrator
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 Posted: Mon, 05 Jul 2004 21:10:55 Post Subject: |
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Funny from FoxNews
July 4th Fireworks ... Grrr!
You ever notice the people who set off illegal fireworks are people you try to avoid making eye contact with while you're mowing your lawn? It's always the idiot in the crowd with the fireworks. I'm not talking about the professional pyrotechnicians involved with the big show. I'm talking about you. Yeah, you, the guy who is about to send off an e-mail to me about how you're safe with fireworks and that you have every right to set them off because you're "patriotic."
You, who exercised his right until 3 a.m. because you think nobody should be asleep on July 4. You, who impressed the pre-teens with your masculine demonstration of pyro-expertise by standing the beer bottle — which you just emptied into your oversized gut — on the street, and inserted a bottle rocket into it. You're the same person who rides an ATV without a helmet late into the night, and uses a loud leaf blower where a broom is sufficient. You're the same guy who flies Old Glory from his car antennae and seriously believes he won't be pulled over for speeding because you're a proud American.
You are an idiot. And please, before you fire off your email, go outside and pick up your fireworks debris from the middle of your block. And save me the delete time, and don't bother hitting send. |
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